Everybody wants to do it their way

We started out at 5:30 stopping in Santa Rosa for coffee for Bruce. I was fasting which is synonymous with starving. We had easy traffic with only a slowdown at the Petaluma Bridge. Fort Mylie at 7AM is quiet. We made it to the lab and had blood drawn in 5 minutes. Next stop, Ambulatory Surgery Unit and an hour wait. When I was called I had to strip and don a lovely green frock which I was quite taken with. It fit. The last time I was given one I could not get my other arm in it let alone get it to cover anything. I was taken to a space age gurney and told to lie down. Bruce was then allowed into the pre-op unit to sit with his suffering friend. An elderly chaplain approached offering solace and graciously withdrew when he realized his services were better employed elsewhere. We waited another hour in which I was fitted with an IV apparatus. We then went for a short ride to Nuclear Medicine. Bruce was unceremoniously relegated to the waiting area. I quickly understood that my procedure was once again changed. They were going in through my belly. I was wheeled into the CT room and made comfortable on the sliding tray. I was hooked up to all the pinging machines and introduced to my team. Doctor Gupta would be doing the material extraction. There was a least one other doctor in attendance, 2 nurses and 3 or 4 assistants. After a couple of passes in the CT machine a grid like screen was placed on my belly which would appear as a map on the final pre-surgical scan. A sterile wrap was opened on my belly exposing my hernia bulge. Four injections were made to numb the area, each one penetrating deeper. I could sense a slight burning as the syringes were emptied. Now for the good part. A very large [!] needle was placed through my belly into the mass. Another scan determined that it had indeed reached its target. This was used as a channel to guide the subsequent apparatuses [shouldn’t that be apparati?]. There were 4, maybe 5 syringes used to “suck” in material. Once inserted they were wiggled a bit and slid in an out ever so slightly, removed and passed to the pathologist who would request “more!” The final insertion was the big one. Planted deep into a node it made a loud click and was removed. At this point I was getting pretty exhausted and was rewarded with the pathologist saying, “that was a really good one. We have enough.” I remained on the machines for another 15 minutes and was then taken back to recovery. After another hour and a tuna salad sandwich, I was released. I am restricted from lifting for a week. I have already informed my clients on Thursday, Friday and Saturday that I will not be helping them with their bags. No problem. Everyone was very nice. Bruce and I high-tailed it out of there and headed to Nordstrom Rack to find some water sandals for Bruce’s annual trip to go fishing in Baja. He came away with a nice pair of Merrill’s AND a nice pair of acid washed canvas Sperry’s. He be stylin’. For lunch we stopped at Avatars in Sausalito. Peter Jones has been hawking this place to me for years and we found out why. It is a Mexican-Punjabi hybrid and it is well worth a visit. I just took a long nap.